Breaking

When your life isn't good enough anymore, when your "best friends" turn back to friends or even to "someone I know", when someone you think didn't care about you starts caring. When you lose contact with someone that's right beside you, when everything starts getting boring and sad. You know you're breaking but you don't want to face it, you don't want to tell anyone. The tears become a daily routine and you stop talking because words are useless, You lose the self confidence you used to have and your smile is just a mask, everything around you is fade, sometimes you lose control.

It's weird being scared of what someone you used to be so close to can think about you.

When you look back at what you used to be, and how you act with others you wonder how they didn't realize it. You need changement but it doesn't happen, you're stuck in this permanent weird mood. It's heavy on your shoulders and on your chest, crying doesn't help anymore. You feel weak and stupid and people probably think the same way.

And one day, a sunshine appears, you meet new people that tell you everything you needed to hear, they bring you back to life and make you hope again. But there's still that thing in your mind, it doesn't want to leave you, whenever you're alone again it comes back and hits you. You're alone in this and when you finally talk to somebody you're afraid of their judgement.

But now you need to get over it and to take control over  your life .